Marriage Counseling

When panic sets in

Julie gave me a call breaking into tears. “My husband left last night, and I have no clue where he is. We need to talk to someone immediately. I don’t want to go through another divorce. If I can get him to come, can we meet tomorrow evening?” “Absolutely, Julie,” I responded. “Let’s plan on meeting tomorrow evening no matter what.” “Ok, thanks.”

And the platform is open…

Matt did sidle in behind Julie the next evening. Looking very solemn, distant, and quiet. Once we got back into the room, the quiet didn’t last for long.

Julie launched into how Matt was incapable of love. Matt went on the defense, and Ding-Ding the fight was on from there.

I watched the Round 1 action taking notes, so the fighters knew what to watch out for later. When the fight was over, both fighters returned to their corners looking emotionally bruised and battered. I then politely informed that they had both lost and that the fight was over. They needed to be rushed off to the Emergency Room.

After several sessions…

As the healing began, Julie and Matt told me some stories about the beginning of their relationship and what they had initially admired about the other one. It became crystal clear that they had to get back to giving to and doing for the other person. Both left with a firm commitment to the power of positive interactions.

As the weeks went on, momentum built. Both partners got better at understanding, respecting, and meeting the other’s unique needs. Conflicts came up, but the fighting spiral was avoided. Forgiveness and love were chosen as the couple developed a problem-solving process that brought them closer together.

How I can help you rebuild your relationship

Over time, people typically tend to do less and less of the loving and caring gestures that were plentiful at the beginning of the relationship.

The everyday stresses of money, time, chores, extended family members, and raising children can really tax couples. Arguments and fights over these issues can lead to a negative interaction spiral that puts distance between spouses.

On some topics, I can help you work together to problem solve and come to a win-win solution that works for both parties. On some issues, I can help you see the benefit in respecting the other’s boundaries, beliefs, and ways of doing things so that negative interactions don’t remain the norm.

I can help you communicate your needs in a way that your partner will be receptive. As this happens, forgiving and moving forward from past hurts feels natural.

It is possible to be happy with your relationship again. Please give me a call today at (941) 549-1521, and let’s get your relationship heading back in the right direction.